Missing Precious moments
by AlysiaStorms
Summary: Set between the two part short story Happiness in the What is this emotion series. James is deep thought as he views memories reluctantly given by the Weaselys of Harry's life. And he sees what he could have been apart of.


I'm still working on my twins' story but this idea; well it couldn't be passed up. Inspired by some of my favorites, and the more commonplace ones that I have seen, this one I hope is different and unique enough for you to remember.

This is in between both parts of **happiness** in the **What is this series**. This is simply when James realizes that his mentor. His hero...made him lose in his son. Precious memories....

Although it simply only a one shot.

**In Dreams...**

James Potter found himself getting steadily drunk and in a bar, as celebrations of Voldemort's defeat went on. His dearest friends Remus and Sirius beside him, the Potter Lord found himself wondering what could have been. Dumbledore had made a mistake. Anthony was not the savior.

Harry was....

Yet nobody cared. They all knew that it was simply a Potter that did it. But he cared, because it cost him his son. Harry was gone. Having apperated to only the Weaselys knows where as they had done what he should have been doing along with Lily and Anthony. Be the family he needed. Their sons became his brothers, as Molly and Arthur became his paren

"How could we...how could we have ignored him." Sirius said mournfully. "How could I? I of all people am his damn godfather!"

Remus taking that moment, to hit Sirius rather hard upside the head. James just shakes his head as the latter tries to apologize. Leaving his two friends where they sit at the bar, "it's all right. I have to get going anyway. Make sure Lily is okay."

Wanting to say something, this time it is Remus who is silenced as Sirius shakes his head. "Sure mate, see you in a couple of days all right?" Reference to their annual Sunday dinner intoned. James just nods his head in response. Still it is more than what he or any of the remaining Potters have done lately.

Anthony and Lily both have just been in a mixture of moping and crying as they try to keep busy. The former was trying desperately to talk to the Weaselys, and tell him where Harry had gone along with their daughter Ginny.

Lily on the other hand, just sobbed as she held onto a toy. A toy that when she had entered Anthony's room the first time. Had been set up for two boys, not one....two.

His flower was taking this the hardest, as she had always prided herself on being the best mother she could be. Yet how she could forget the one, who in the beginning begged for her love? Reaching home, he found her as he had left her that evening still in the same spot. Holding on to the little toy stag, that once knew a lot of love and tears by its wear. They knew it had to have been Harry's for Anthony, had always chosen to play with a stuffed dog when he was baby. The stag was Harry....

Finding himself dropping to the floor beside his wife, he could still see the tracks of tears on her reddened cheeks. Even though her eyes were dry as a bone, it did not stop the sadness from marking her flesh.

"I want my baby James." Lily whispered brokenly. "I want my baby so much!"

Holding her tightly to him, he simply rocks her back and forth. The red headed woman just slack in his arms, rather then strong and firm as she was known to be.... His flower was wilted now.

Eventually as she falls asleep, it is that moment that Anthony returns. Carrying a Pensieve, placing it on the table, James looks up curiously at his son.

"Dumbledore....convinced them to at least share their memories. The Weaselys, Hermione, Neville...many of them." The boy replied bitterly. "It was his way of apologizing for what he had done to us. It's all there....Harry's life with them. I would advise don't let Mum see any of it, Dad."

"Why not?"

"His...his wedding is one of the memories."

James immediately paled. The fact that they got memories at least was a step forward. But for that....

"Married....?"

Anthony nodded unhappily as he collapsed in the chair across from them. "As of three days ago....it's all there dad. It's all there....and I will **never** forgive the Headmaster. He cost me my brother."

That said, he stood back up and left to go upstairs. Hearing the sounds of his doors slamming shut, James quietly followed to place his wife in bed. The red headed woman, curling into the warmth of the blankets out of instinct, he bends down to place a kiss on her forehead.

"Please sleep soundly, my flower...."

Normally, this would be the time he would join her. Telling her of his love, his worship of all that she is to him in his life, but the memories call to him.

It does not take long before he finds himself just sitting there in front of the Pensieve. The fact that Anthony knew of the wedding, and that he was angry, gave James the feeling that more was in these memories.

Bending over he begins to see....

**Harry mate! You did it! Ron Weasely stated in surprise. The red headed youth grinning as the then 11 year old Harry showed him a snitch in his hands. A young Hermione Granger and Neville Longbottom laughing beside him as the black haired boy grins sheepishly....**

**I did didn't I. **

**  
The youngest seeker in a century! Neville shouted out with glee. Your dad would be so proud! **

**Why don't you write him Harry! Hermione asked. **

**You...think he would be? **

**  
Why wouldn't he be? Ron asked in puzzlement. I mean sure Anthony is not on the team. But you are. It's got to account for something. I mean NO BODY makes it their first year and you did!**

James just found his heart breaking as the Pensieve paused to give him time to gather his wits. He...he did remember receiving a letter from his son now. It had taken him so long to find it again, when he disappeared. Not remembering any such thing. And yet there it was...among Anthony's many letters. He could see the joy written within the writing of an eleven year old seeking his Dad to say four simple words**. I'm proud of you....**

But he never did....

The Pensieve starts up again...this time moving to a different memory. One featuring a nemesis whose eyes seem to soften. Severus....

**Harry talk to him! Ron's being a git. It's not your fault that you are a Parselmouth. And it is not your fault all this is going on. The Professors will figure it out! They have to!**

**What if he's right though? What if I should have been in Slytherin like the hat said Hermione! **

**You don't belong there Mr. Potter. **

**  
Both children look up to find Severus Snape coming into the room. The dark man, just looking at the two with a cool eye, it changes as he bends down to their level. You don't have what it takes to survive in the den of Snakes Harry. No matter what gifts you have. After all you have something many of them lack.**

**  
What?**

**A heart...**

James runs fingers through his hair that moment, as he sees the tentative bond beginning to grow between his son and his enemy from school. Severus was there for Harry. His nemesis....gave him comfort.

It...it was supposed to be him to do so. Parents give their children comfort. Not enemies...

The Pensieve rolling again, James watched as a very frightened Harry finds himself facing off with what seems to be a dementor in the middle of the potions classroom. Hermione and Neville beside Professor Snape in the distance watching, the children held onto chocolate bars that they were eating.

**EXPECTO PATRONUM!**

**A beautiful bat flies out of the end of the wand and Severus just looks on in shock as he closes the trunk lid. Hermione and Neville running to congratulate their friend, the trio stands there as Snape approaches.**

**Harry I'm honored but why me?**

**The 13 year old beamed at him.**

**Because Professor. You listened. **

**Harry replied as he hugged the potions master tightly. Severus giving in to the affection, as Hermione and Neville watch with huge smiles on their features.**

James almost screamed then with envy. He saw the adoration for the potions master in the eyes of his son. The fact that the happiest moment, Harry has is one with the man he has hated all through his school tears him apart.

It should have been a stag, wolf, or some kind of other animal. Not a bat...anything but that. Because...because he as his father or even Sirius and Remus should have been there. They should have been there to offer him comfort, to teach him to fight his fears and not Severus Snape.

The memories swirl again. This time, it is one that puts him in shock.

**Professor I have to! You know Anthony is not, I am! He won't survive! Harry screamed out as he was currently tied up in front of Severus Snape. This time, the youngest Weasely girl beside him, her eyes filled with worry as Harry trembles constantly with pain. **

**You can't Harry. You know what Voldemort will due to you. Severus replied. **

**He can't if he can't get me. **

**DAMNIT IT POTTER LISTEN! Your brother is the one that was put in the Goblet, mistakenly. Not you. Be lucky I switched your wand with his. I know that the cores between your wand and the Dark Lord's are identical; if I am right the Priori Incantetum should spare your brother, long enough for Albus and the others to get to him!**

**Let me go help him!  
**

**Harry...please listen. Professor Snape is right. You will not do Anthony nor anyone else any good, if you go. **

**Ginny...**

**Please...please Harry. Ginny whispered softly. **

**Her pleas reaching his ears, the boy slouches down into his chair in defeat. **

**Fine...so be it.**

Why....why could he, Harry's own father not see these moments first hand. Why didn't he?

Because you had your hands full with Anthony, and you had to protect him so he could learn. So he could be safe. You couldn't be with your other son. The one whom needed you...but you forgot. That you ignored.

You couldn't realize that maybe together, both boys could have been stronger.

**Hermione sat there and was crying alongside Harry. Neville mourning with him, the two of them offered comfort to a boy who was in tears as others seemed to celebrate around them. He could even hear his own voice in the background. **

**It was the day Snape was found dead.**

**I'm so sorry Harry.... Hermione said softly. I'm sure he died painlessly at least. **

**He wasn't supposed to. Harry whispered. He wasn't supposed to 'mione. He promised he would teach me more to defend myself. He promised!**

**Harry.... I know he never meant to. Neville murmured in comfort. Look at the bright side though Harry. He was right.**

**About what? **

**Your Dad is being a right git for celebrating his death. **

**A small smile crossing his lips, Harry can not help but give the other a hug as well as Hermione.**

This memory left James feeling cold though. His son mourned. His son grieved...and he did nothing. He was to busy happy over his nemesis getting what he thought was his just desserts, he never bothered to think about those Severus could have cared for.

"I am a git."

**Harry are you serious. How do you know? Hermione whispered in shock. **

**I overheard Dumbledore, Dad, and Anthony talking about them. I know where they are though.**

**Voldemort's Horcruxes? Ginny asked with a firm kind of curiosity.**

**Nodding his head the young man turned to his two best friends and girlfriend/fiancée. Yeah I know where they are, the connection works two ways. And I have figured out how to get into his as much as he does mine.**

**Then take us with you. Neville stated as he stood forth. **

**No.**

**Harry. You can't do this alone.**

**Watch me Neville.**

**Harry what about your parents? What about your brother? Hermione asked. Certainly you will tell them?**

**They don't care. They never did Hermione. I bet they won't even notice, since they plan on pulling Anthony out anyway. **

**If you won't let them come with you Harry...I can't stop you. But I WILL come or so heaven help me, I will make the rest of your life a living hell. Ginny stated firmly. The red head stepping forward, she had a look of ferocity that Harry could not help but smile at.**

He remembers.... he and Lily had indeed taken Anthony out of Hogwarts that year and as Harry had stated. They didn't even notice him gone. They had just left him there for he was safe or so they thought. And they thought he had come home on his own. Never remembering...that not once had he ever been to Godric's Hollow...because they had given him to Lily's sister....they just thought he was there.

But Harry...Harry was right at that time they didn't care about him. They never called his name. They never saw him laugh or smile...they never saw.

And that hurt. It hurt so much.

This memory...this one coming though, was the one that sent him into despair and anger. This one lone memory....

**Harry! Settle down mate! Ron laughed as he looked at the dark haired youth. Neville beside him, the two were dressed in black robes as Harry seemed to be doing all that he could to fiddle with his hair. **

**I just want to look perfect for your sister Ron! **

**The red headed youth smiling indulgently, he looks up as the door opens to find Arthur coming into the room. Recently elected Minister, he wore his office robes and could not help but be holding something.**

**Both of the younger men understanding, they grin as the head of the Weasely family approaches. **

**Harry...I shouldn't be doing this. I mean...your father was supposed to give you the blessings and all. **

**He doesn't deserve it Arthur. You...you and Molly do. Harry said softly in response. You have treated me when I was sick. You got me away from the Dursleys. You gave me a home when I wanted one. You guys were there for me. Even when me and the git over there were fighting.**

**  
HEY!**

**An indulgent grin was given, at the indignant reply from Ron, who was bright red with irritation at the teasing jibe. **

**Ron, you and Neville are my brothers. Don't forget that.**

**The two smiling warmly, they find Molly wandering in, to fix Harry's robes with hands and loving smiles.**

**There now Harry! You look perfect! **

**Thanks...Mom...Dad. **

**Both Weaselys beam with pride as they give Harry their best smiles as Neville and Ron both go out in front of them. The two younger men both knew that this time was something for Harry and the two older folks alone. The memory continuing on, he saw as the Weaselys handed him a worn gold watch.**

**It isn't much Harry, but it belonged to Molly's brother Fabian. We believe he would have wanted you to have it. **

**A beaming smile crossing his lips, he takes it with gentle hands to see the worn watch that ticks with life as it glows with familial warmth of a family blessing.**

**Thank you... I will treasure it always. Harry grinned as he put in the front pocket of his robes, close to his heart.**

It was then that James yanked himself out of the Pensieve. He couldn't watch anymore of it. He just couldn't. Not after seeing the familiar Wizarding traditions that he himself was supposed to do for his boys...are taken away from him on behalf of one of them.

When he was younger and they were still children, he had on intended them to have a set of rings. Rings, that belonged to the grandparents they never knew, when they married. Harry being the older, would have gotten the wedding bands, as Anthony...would have received the engagement...

Both beautiful and simple in their own ways, James remembers his parents had never taken them off.

So much he missed. So much he could have seen, could have done for Harry, so much he could have been a part of. But...but he was blind. He was blind... He never saw the little boy who needed him, and now that he wishes he was still there.

All he sees is the young man who no longer wants him.


End file.
